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Category Archives: Humor

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.

Best joke I’ve heard in a long time

Okay, so this a computer joke that no one in my family gets. I’m desperate to share a laugh with someone who will! Knock knock. Who’s there. (long pause) Java. Bwahahahahaha! Someone. Anyone. Laugh with me!

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999.53664635646766.266

That’s my web number in case Joe Biden wants to pay me an internet visit.

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I love Jesus but I drink a little

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She's Minnesota nice

As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the window, and she says “Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load.” The trucker ignores her and proceeds...

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They re-invented the wheel

Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard

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lmao

Did you know… If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you. There is no ‘ctrl’ button on Chuck Norris’s computer. Chuck Norris is always in control. Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song. Chuck Norris can sneeze with his...

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He's not a morning cat

Peter, our beloved cat, has been dressed up in doll clothes, strolled in strollers, rocked in rocking chairs, and danced with to Abba music. He’s an amiable feline with the patience of a saint. But don’t wake him up early in the morning or he gives the evil eye. Peter and I have that in...

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Thanks, Al. You're the best.

I’m so glad that whenever I need a good laugh I can always count on Weird Al.

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Everything he needs to know, he learned in kindergarten

Today is Kait’s birthday which means that I’m a mother of a 20 year old. When did I get this old?? I feel like hip replacements are suddenly just around the corner. Anyway, we spent the afternoon together and she reminded me of something Logan said that I never want to forget. When Logan was...

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Seriously, you have to check this out

Are you having a crappy day??? Click here and go read what my friend Jeff just posted on his site. Trust me.You’re gonna laugh.

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Flip This Couch

My family I love practical jokes. I love planning them. I love the anticipation.  I love seeing people’s reactions. Logan fell asleep on the couch tonight. The rest of the family decided that it would be really funny to turn the couch around so that when he wakes up, he’ll be facing the living room wall and, for just a moment, be totally confused. The hard part of this little practical joke was keeping our...

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Aviator's Marriage On Auto-Pilot

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Pawn-Shop Customer Plans To Buy Toaster Back

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New Bono-Rail To Transport U2 At The Speed Of Rock

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Science-Fair Carny Correctly Guesses Atomic Weight

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Paranoid Optimist Thinks Everyone Is Out To Get Him a Present

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Hidden Valley Ranch Bombed By Balsamic Extremists

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Fulltime Mother Drinking On Job Again

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Boy Under Influence, Crashes Bike

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Spokeswoman Gives Birth To Spokeschild

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Click

A few years ago we had problems with the television set in our bedroom. Every night while we were watching the 10 PM news, we would get as far as the sports segment and the tv would suddenly turn off without explanation. Darren would have to get up out of bed and turn it back...

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Lost In Translation

  The following are literal English translations of Latin phrases as interpreted by a stay-at-home mother: Ad absurdum- “For the third time, you cannot have another scoop of ice cream” Ad nauseum- “Tummy ache? I told you not to have another scoop of ice cream” Addendum- “Don’t forget to brush your teeth” Affidavit- the evidence...

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