It's been said that in order to fully appreciate the holiday, adults should attempt to see Christmas through the eyes of a child. Yeah right. Yesterday I tried to do just that by paying careful attention to the conversations taking place in my home:
“Mom said she’s spent the same amount on everyone but I deserve a bigger present than you. You don’t do anything around here but eat, sleep and make messes for everyone else.”
“Yeah, well, we’d know by now what she bought us if you hadn’t complained about her putting the presents under the tree so early last year. Now we don’t get to find out until Christmas DAY!”
“All I know is that it better be something I like.”
“Oh yeah? How do you gift wrap laziness?”
“Shut up, you retard!”
And then I overheard:
“I’m returning whatever Mom and Dad got me so I can buy BB’s for my gun.”
“What if she gives you the gift of hard work?”
“Then I’m going to regift it to you.”
Yes. How can you not help but want to bestow expensive and numerous gifts upon children who behave in this manner?
My wish for Christmas, the only gift I want, is to have a Christmas like this one:
