Today is a milestone for me. Kait started college and now I’m feeling old. Sensible shoes old. Decorate my shirts with a Bedazzler old. Clap on, clap off old.

Had I not just caught a glimpse of myself in the patio doors and noticed that my nipples were clearly not in alignment inside my 18 17 1/2 hour bra, this day would have been marked down as one to remember with fondness.

Amazing how a little reflection can put a damper on things for what is more embarassing than realizing that you’ve greeted the UPS driver with one nipple pointing to the sky while the other is aimed to the ground like a child searching for candy at a parade.

And yes. It is a chilly day.

Victoria isn’t the only one with a secret. These days things just don’t fall into place. They require coaxing and a laser level to set things straight. And today, with the excitement of Kait’s first day of post-secondary education and the hub-bub surrounding that, my secret was revealed to a man in a brown uniform who actually did a double take before averting his eyes to the dog as I reached for my package.

How am I ever going to order anything online again?

Rarely does my family get to attend events like Twins games at the Metrodome in Minneapolis so when we were offered four tickets, I was thrilled. I immediately called Darren at work and told him our good news.

“Can you believe it? You can take three kids to the game! They LOVE baseball!”

Darren’s enthusiasm level was less than I was expecting. He had put in a long day and was now facing a 45 minute drive home and another 45 minute drive back into the twin cities.

“Oh c’mon!” I argued, “When do we ever get to do something like this? You HAVE to take them!” I used the Tone normally reserved for the moments I absolutely know that I am right. It was the Tone which says “Nuh-uh! You are not getting out of this one, Mister. Don’t even bother to argue!!”

And he agreed.

Meanwhile, the children and I put names in a hat to determine who would get to attend with Dad. Isaiah, Logan and Elly all picked the winning pieces of paper and were jumping around in excitement. Daniel immediately went to his room filled with disappointment. (One of the most difficult things about parenting a large family is knowing that pretty much every decision I make will be met with someone feeling left out or slighted.) My heart went out to Dan and I went down to his room to have the can’t-we-be-happy-for-others talk that I’ve done a bajillion times before. I found his door locked. Rather than force him into a conversation he was in no state of mind to have, I turned around and walked back up the stairs. That’s when I ran into Elly.

“Mom, I was thinking. Since Danny loves baseball more than me, he can have my ticket.”

“But Elly, you won that fair and square. You don’t have to feel bad about going to the game!”

“Naw. I want him to go. It’s not that big of a deal to me.”

In that moment I realized just what an amazing daughter I have. She’s eight years old. When I was eight, I was guiltless stealing my siblings Halloween candy and enjoying it out in the field behind out house. She is just precious. I encouraged her to share the news with Danny and hurried upstairs to get dinner ready before they had to leave.

As soon as Darren arrived home, they piled into the van and sped down the driveway. Darren knew that traffic would be bad and since he had to stop to get cash, he was worried about being late. I said a quick prayer asking God to help them arrive safely. At the time I had no idea how much that prayer needed to be said.

I had just finished giving Elly a little pedicure when Kevin shouted from the other room “Mom! The bridge on 35W collapsed! Turn on the TV!” I thought he was joking until the news anchors confirmed with words what my son had just said. There were no images of the horrible scene yet, just eyewitnesses calling in to the station reporting that the bridge over the Mississippi had fallen right into the water.

While my mind sped with images of my family on that bridge, my body worked in slow motion. I tried to call Darren on my cell phone and my fingers wouldn’t work properly. I tried again and couldn’t remember the numbers. I was in sheer panic by the time I completed the dialing. The call went directly to Darren’s voicemail the first time.

“OMG…and I was the one MAKING him go! I INSISTED!”

The second try, which seemed like an eternity to attempt, connected me with him. He and the kids were stuck in traffic as one police car after another sped by him. He was about five miles north of the bridge as it collapsed and yet had no idea what was going on. Once I told him what happened, we both realized how life could have forever changed for us that day. He was able to turn around and head for home before our cell phones lost connection due to the massive amounts of calls being places in the area.

As of today, there are still people missing after the collapse. So many families are going through the hell that we somehow avoided. I just praise God for sparing mine. It will be a long time before I insist on anything again.

A while ago I placed an ad for child care in the local papers. It was somewhat surprising to have received only a handful of calls when all the daycare providers in the area stated that they “turn new families away” every day. I anticipated a deluge of calls the moment the paper came out.

Instead, I received two.

Both families were available to meet with me on the same day so I spaced the meeting times far enough apart so as not to
interfere with one another. Also, I knew how much work it would take to prepare my home for guests. (Like removing year old fingerprints from the walls without repainting like I normally do.)

My sweet children and I cleaned and organized to the point where I could have comfortably invited the folks from “Better Homes and Gardens” over without fearing they would find a half-eaten peanut butter sandwich from 1992 stuffed in the cushions of my well used couch.

But neither family showed up and neither family called to say they wouldn’t be showing up. We waited, staring out the window at the road like children waiting for Santa to arrive on Christmas eve, for hours.

A few weeks later I placed another ad. It produced only one call and it was from one of the families who didn’t bother to show up last time. Having learned my lesson, I gently stated that I would be neurotically cleaning scheduling my day around her arrival so if for some reason she could not make our meeting, I would appreciate a phone call. She enthusiatically agreed that she would call if something came up. “Friday at 2 PM would be perfect!”

Motivating my children to help me prepare for “an event” is not difficult. I have really excellent children who seem to thrive on deadlines and goal setting. This morning when I told everyone we needed to get cleaning, they joyfully pitched in and worked really hard. Around noon we had everything shiny clean! I promised them Dairy Queen treats for their efforts and asked one more favor:

“Could you please, PLEASE be playing ball together as she pulls in the driveway?”

At 1:45 PM they headed out with the mission of making my daycare home seem like a scene from Norman Rockwell’s village. At 2:05 PM they started to complain of muscle cramps. At 2:20 PM they realized that we had been stood up yet again by this thoughtless wench obviously busy woman.

Now, it is nice to enter the weekend with a well cleaned, sweet smelling home. However, this whole thing does leave me wondering if maybe God isn’t trying to tell me something.

Like maybe I should just keep up with my cleaning so that it’s not such an ordeal every time this happens. Or maybe I shouldn’t try to give the false impression that I run a spotless home. Whatever the case, my children are getting LARGE DQ treats because, in my opinion, they deserve a month of sundaes.

 

While sorting through closets today, trying to discern what should be tossed before adding new school clothes, the kids happened upon their Halloween costumes. They immediately, and with great enthusiasm, tried them on and paraded around the house for each others pleasure.

And pain.

Apparently wearing a Superman costume gives permission to do hurtful things to one’s siblings. I found Logan pinning his older
brother to the ground while dangling a wad of spit from his lips.



“Um, excuse me. When did Superman ever use his super strength for evil?” I asked, ready to put an end to the scene.

“Danny told me it looks like I’m wearing a diaper. He deserves it!” Logan retorted.

“He said that?? Well then, by all means…spit away.”

“Mommm!!!” whined Danny, “You can’t say that!”

“Sure I can. You said he was wearing diapers. How do you think that makes Superman feel?”

As I left the room and returned my attention to the closets, I overheard Danny’s solution:

“LOGAN! I have kryptonite farts and you are about to DIE!”

Over the weekend we headed up to Grand Marais to celebrate my birthday as well as Isaiah’s. Though I’ve been there so many times before, I’ve never enjoyed it more. There’s something so special about a place where the rugged terrain meets the (sometimes) softness of the Great Lake.

We drove up the Gunflint Trail to see for ourselves the devastation of the recent fire. I was expecting a blackened land barren of all life but what I found was a rather sensational display of lush, flowering plants. It is apparent that nothing can stop nature from doing what she does best–flourishing!

Saturday morning I awoke early and showered before the campgrounds sprang to life. I returned to the campsite, grabbed my camera and headed down to the harbor to watch the sun rise. A few devoted fishermen were heading out to their favorite spots but other than the sound of the waves lapping at the rocks, it was silent and golden. For a few moments I felt like the earth was mine and mine alone.

View photos from my trip here.

One day I am going to own a resort on the Gunflint Trail.

Breakfast will be served at 7 AM and I’ll pack lunches for on the boat. When you return from catching the largest walleye you’ve ever laid eyes on, there will be fresh sheets on your bed and the scent of bread baking in the kitchen. Dinner will be ready just about the time your stomach sounds like a grizzly bear. Go ahead and have a second helping!

After dinner you can sit around the fire Elly will entertain you with Hannah Montana songs.

And my heart will be so full.