I was told, upon accepting the job in the Lunch Room, that watching the television show “Prison Break” is mandatory for employment. It seems the Lunch Ladies like the Prison Break Guys a lot and that is fine. They were just trying to include me in their inner circle. The problem is that I have...
Monthly Archives: September 2006
We lived in our home with plywood subflooring for three whole years and it was all my fault. In the year 2001, I had three children in cloth diapers. I know that no one wants to hear yet another mom complain about diapers in a blog but stick with me. During this season in my...
When I was about eleven years old I asked my mom if I could wallpaper a hallway in our home. For some reason, which has completely disappeared with age, I enjoyed the process of measuring spaces and places to determine things like “How much wallpaper will I need to cover the walls?” My mom talked...
“OH NOOOOO!!! WHAT A [bleeping] IDIOT! HE FUMBLED THE BALL AND THEY WOULD HAVE HAD THE GAME IF THEY WOULD HAVE JUST LET THE CLOCK RUN OUT!!!” This outburst was followed by the crashing of a laundry basket onto the floor and what sounded to me like a combination of fingernails on a chalkboard and...
She was seven pounds, fourteen ounces when she was born. She was a beautiful baby, content and cheerful most of the time. When Kevin was born, Kait took immediate ownership of him and nurtured him with patience and kindness, always including her toddling brother in her adventures. When Kait was five she was determined to...
While getting ready for church this morning, I noticed that my 17 year old daughter was wearing something which falls into the “Iffy” category. I made a comment: “Kait, pull up your shirt. I can see too much.” She responded “Mom, if I pull up the front of my shirt, you can see my butt....
While getting ready for church this morning, I noticed that my 17 year old daughter was wearing something which falls into the “Iffy” category. I made a comment: “Kait, pull up your shirt. I can see too much.” She responded “Mom, if I pull up the front of my shirt, you can see my butt....
There is no such thing as preventable stress when you have to wake seven children in the morning. Every single day they all go through the five stages of grief: Denial- “Honey, wake up. It’s time for school.18 and life You got it18 and life you knowYour crime is timeand it’s 18 and life to...
Are mothers ever short on cute things her kids have said? I think not and so here’s the verbal equivalent of you having to sit through one of my vacation slide shows. Today’s showcase features Elly Joy, without whom this world would be a much more joyless, quiet place: Recently Elly overheard me ask my...
Are mothers ever short on cute things her kids have said? I think not and so here’s the verbal equivalent of you having to sit through one of my vacation slide shows. Today’s showcase features Elly Joy, without whom this world would be a much more joyless, quiet place: Recently Elly overheard me ask my...
Up until last year I homeschooled our children. From September 1993 until September 2005 I taught them all how to read and write, to think independently and be self motivated. I taught them the names of all the planets, the colors of the spectrum, multiplication tables, long division, the history of the world, civics, and...
Yesterday was my first day as Lunch Lady. I’ll admit to being overwhelmed with the trial by fire. I would much rather have been trained in for several days before school started but nope. I got one day of “This is how you turn on the deep fryer. Now go deep fry.” Part of the...